Northern California Trip Part One

This past weekend I drove just over 900 miles. And none of it had anything to do with car rallies! I went to visit my cousin Cindy in Windsor, California. She is probably the person in my family I most relate to - she’s a little crazy like me. Well, ok, she’s a lot crazy - just like me. It used to be about 6-7 hours to drive there, now It’s a whole day’s drive to get there because of traveling with a kid. I can only hope it doesn’t get too much longer with another kid. Thank goodness Eddie loves traveling in the car.

I try to get up there as often as I can. It ends up being about once a year, although I missed 2011. I went in July 2010, 4 months before my wedding. Cindy was in my wedding and so I wanted to do some wedding stuff with her. I ended up getting my dress while I was there at a little boutique in town. Packing back then meant throwing a few clothes in a bag and bringing some snacks for the drive.

Last September when Eddie was 14 months old I headed up there again. This time packing was a bit more complicated. In addition to my clothes, I had to pack Eddie’s clothes plus a portable crib and bedding, high chair, stroller, food and milk for the drive up, Eddie’s plates and cups, diapers, toys, and books. My car was full. This was my first experience driving a long distance from home with Eddie. I had written a car rally with him when he was only a few months old, but if he happened to get cranky we could always just head home. On this trip, we were far from home. He could not be a better car kid, I don’t know how I got so lucky. Back then, Eddie would only poop at home. No really, I’m serious. So I was a bit concerned about that. He didn’t go in the car or once we got there in the evening. The next day, however, was a poopapalooza. Three poops, one right after another. He was clearly holding it in for a while and I was happy to know he felt like he was at home at my cousin’s house.

There are two main routes through Central California, Interstate 5 and California Hwy 99. I used to take I-5 assuming the Interstate would be faster. But after talking to my dad (who goes up and down the state somewhat often) I decided to try CA-99. It is so much better. I-5 is two lanes and has few stops. CA-99 is often 3 lanes, sometimes 4, and goes through more cities and therefore has more places available to stop. Plus I think going through cities is much more pleasant than miles and miles of nothingness. The main factor in choosing my route from the center of the state west to Windsor is that I hate going over bridges. I really hate being charged a toll to be terrified. And since I have to go through or around the Bay Area, bridges are a concern. The Bay Area also has really bad traffic. When it was just me I would plan the time through the Bay Area to coincide with traffic patterns, but now since it takes longer and I have to travel on the kid’s timeline and not just mine I can’t do that as easily. So last visit and this visit I started looking at alternatives. I now go over the top of the San Francisco Bay (which is surprisingly large) and only have to go over a couple of tiny bridges. The bridge I avoid by doing this is 5.5 miles long. That’s 5.5 miles of white knuckle terror I don’t have to go through. CA-12 to I-80 to CA-37 is much more scenic. There are protected wetlands with hills in the background. And I avoid more of US-101 coming out of San Francisco which is a traffic disaster pretty much always.

I considered taking even more back roads to get there this time, but I didn’t mostly because I’m pregnant. I know how often there are available bathrooms on the route I took because I also took the same one last time. Once I get off CA-99, bathrooms are a bit more scarce but often enough that I wouldn’t pee my pants in the car. Maybe next time on the way home, when it’s at the beginning of the trip and not at the end, I’ll take some back roads through Sonoma and Napa counties. The nice thing about having kids is that you can use the carpool lanes. This comes in handy when I finally get on US-101 and can zip by most of the traffic for the last 20 miles or so going up there and the first 20 miles coming home.

One of the apps I have on my phone is for In ‘N Out. If you aren’t from California, you may not be familiar with this little piece of heaven. It’s a burger place. And that’s pretty much all they make. Burgers, fries, shakes, sodas, and in varying combinations.  I like my cheeseburger Animal Style, which means they cook the patty with mustard and then they put dill pickles, extra thousand island dressing, and grilled onions on the burger in addition to the usual tomato and lettuce. Their fries are made fresh, you can actually watch them cut up the potatoes and put them into the frying oil. Eddie will usually fall asleep after about an hour of driving and stay asleep until almost lunch time. So when he wakes up I check the app to see where the next In ‘N Out is, and stop there for lunch. There are more locations on CA-99 than I-5, another reason to pick that route. The old ones are drive thru only with a few tables outside, the newer ones have indoor seating (high chairs available). This is preferable if you are traveling with a toddler, but part of me still loves the old ones the best.

I only had to make two other stops after that, one for gas and one for the bathroom. I need three tanks of gas to make the round trip, so I fill up before I go, fill up once on the way there, and once on the way back. I waited a bit too long to go to the bathroom and ended up having to go really bad by the time I stopped. At least I probably won’t have to deal with that next time I go. Gotta love the third trimester of pregnancy, right?

I decided to make a detailed packing list this time so I didn’t forget anything. When I say detailed, I mean detailed. Every single item of clothing, toys, books, food, even the big items were on the list. It was 4 pages long. It helped immensely. I could see what needed to be done and what was all ready to go. I worked on it for a week or two and started packing a few days before I left. I have never felt more organized before leaving for a trip ever. It didn’t seem to change the fact that I didn’t feel like I had enough time to get everything done, however.

I had a special delivery to take up with me. On Cindy’s dad’s side of her family a relative owns a British pub style restaurant in Burbank called The Buchanan Arms. They make bangers and mash with gravy, but they deep fry their bangers in the same batter as the fish and chips. It’s not far from me, but Cindy laments the distance because she loves the bangers and mash so much. She called me a few days before I left and wanted to know if I could stop there and bring some. So I picked up some bangers, gravy, and the batter mix to bring with me. We had that the night I got there. Wow. It was amazing. Yum, yum, and more yum. Probably the longest takeout delivery I’ve ever been involved with.

More about the trip next post. It was a fun filled busy weekend!

The Struggle of Childbirth

Warning: This post will use fun words like vagina, cervix, uterus, placenta, catheter, and other things that may not be for the easily grossed out. It’s about a baby being ripped out of someone else’s body. You have been thusly warned.

Childbirth is not for the weak. No matter what the situation it is a struggle. It’s kind of amazing that the human race has lasted as long as it has considering this is what we need to do to reproduce. I read everything I could and envisioned what I would do in different situations. Let me tell you, I did not run enough scenarios to prepare me for what actually happened.

My due date was Friday, July 15. My baby shower was on Sunday, July 17. What can I say, I live on the edge. I had an appointment on July 21, if nothing happened by then they were going to schedule an induction. I went to that appointment still pregnant, still no signs of labor. I wanted to put off the induction as long as they would let me to see if I went into labor naturally. I knew my husband had some work appointments over the weekend so I talked them into waiting until Monday night, July 25. I got to the hospital around 9pm. They did an ultrasound to make sure the baby was facing the right way and things like the placenta and umbilical cord were in the right place. Or at least not the wrong place. Baby looked great, everything was great. About 10pm they gave me the first drugs to jump start labor. It would take about 12 hours to gage if it was starting to work. My husband went home and I slept. Next morning: nothing. So they gave me another dose. Another 12 hours, only a slight dilation of the cervix. This entire time they had me on an IV drip and were carefully measuring my urine output. I kind of felt like a toddler being toilet trained. They gave me different drugs, and something started to happen. Enough that they were able to insert a tube through the vagina and blow up two balloons, one on either side of the cervix. The idea is that it would put pressure on the cervix to encourage it to open up.

This was NOT comfortable in any way. Also, I had the end of the tube taped to the inside of my thigh. Ug. I was so happy when it fell out while I was peeing. My water broke or at least partially broke at that time as well. Conveniently, I was sitting on the toilet when that happened. Less mess to clean up. Now they started the good drugs in earnest. This somewhere around Tuesday night or Wednesday morning. I was dilated 4 centimeters and it was starting to look promising.

The contractions started really coming at this point. They were bad. Worse than I imagined. Worse than I could have ever imagined. I have a pretty high tolerance for pain. I was able to handle the pain, but I couldn’t have followed any kind of directions or tried to push. My poor husband was freaking out seeing me in that much pain. I know he wished he could have taken it all away. Love him so much! The worst thing was that the contractions were coming but the cervix was stubbornly not dilating. Finally I couldn’t take the pain anymore and had the epidural. I think if things had been progressing faster I would have done it without drugs like I intended, but I didn’t see an end in sight. And I can tell you, I do NOT look forward to ever getting one of those again. It does not feel good. The worst part of the whole thing was the anesthesiologist asking me if he had the right location on my back. Um, dude, you’re the one looking at it, and you’re the professional. How should I know? Got the catheter put in at this point as well. At least I no longer have to get up to go to the bathroom, right?

So now the contractions are still coming but I am in little to no pain. I have still only dilated 6 centimeters. It’s Wednesday night, July 27. I came in and they started the drugs 48 hours ago. I have heard women screaming from down the hall followed by baby cries at least three times, if not more. I am ready for this kid to be out. If the contractions are allowed to go on much longer the constant squeezing of the uterus will start to put the baby into serious distress. I also was starting to run a low fever and they had ice packs all over me. They finally gently suggest that maybe they should do a C-Section.

My worst nightmare has just come true.

C-Section. The words ring out in my brain. C-Section. No. No. C-section. Nononononononono. No. C-section. NO! NO! NO!

At this point, I have quite a crowd in my room as earlier in the day when there was the big jump in cervix opening everyone thought it was going to happen soon. My dad was there as well as two good friends of mine, and of course my husband. My first thought when they suggested a Caesarean was to just flat out tell them no, this kid is coming out of the hole that is already in my uterus, thank you very much, you don’t need to make another one. But then I thought about the fact that the hole nature had provided was not getting big enough for the kid. So I shooed everyone except the husband out of the room so we could talk about it.

Thank God I am blessed with the most amazing, supportive husband on the planet. Who also isn’t afraid to admit he was just as scared as I was.

We decided about 11:20 to do the C-section. They didn’t seem like they were in a complete rush at that point so the freaking out husband and dad-to-be asked if he had time to go outside and collect his thoughts (I wished I could have done that too!). All of the sudden they are wheeling me into the operating room. I kept saying, “You are not cutting me open until my husband gets back! Where is he? Wait!!!” They kept assuring me he was right outside. Good thing he came in before they started doing anything or they would have had a crazy woman on their hands. It seems that something on the baby monitor made them move with a bit more urgency. Getting the epidural turned out to be a good thing as that was already set up. At this point, it is about 11:45pm. So... will the kid be “born” on the 27th or the 28th? I can see the big clock on the wall even without my glasses on. It inches ever closer to midnight and they are starting to work on me. I can hear the doctors and nurses talking but I’m tuning them out because if I listen to what they are saying I’ll get grossed out knowing they are talking about me. I am just concentrating on my husband and trying to talk to him as much as possible. Then the clock hits 12:01 and I at least know the birthdate, even if I still don’t know the gender yet. 4 minutes later, they announce it’s a boy and I can hear him crying. My husband was convinced it was going to be a girl, and I can still hear him say, a little unbelievingly, “I have a son?” Finally, I could put a name to this thing that had been kicking me for so many months. Meanwhile, I’m still strapped to the table as they continue to put everything back together and staple me up. And thus the clueless journey began. Little Edward Russell had come into the world.

Edward Russell shortly after
being yanked out of me

Next time: the switch from labor and delivery to the maternity ward.

Selfie at 28 weeks

28 weeks pregnant, the start of the third trimester. I am really starting to feel pregnant. 3 months to go.

Going to the doctor

Olive View Medical Center

I had a doctor’s appointment this week. I think I have had more doctor’s appointments in my two combined pregnancies than I had in the rest of my life. If you remember from my pregnancy post last week, I don’t have health insurance. But I’m not complaining, because in Los Angeles County there is a pretty good system for residents that don’t have insurance and don’t qualify for Medi-Cal if you got to the county-run hospitals/clinics. I go to Olive View Medical Center in Sylmar. It’s not the closest county hospital to my house but it is the nicest. For prenatal care, I pay $60 for doctor visits and ultrasounds which also includes any lab work that is ordered. After seven visits it’s free, kind of like using a customer loyalty card. For delivery of the baby, it’s $2000. That includes if it is a natural birth, induced labor, C-section, everything. When Eddie was born I was there a week. Labor was induced, after 50 hours they did a C-section, then I was there for another 4 days. Eddie was in NICU for 48 hours. The entire bill was $2000. I’ve known people with insurance that have paid more. And what’s even better is the prenatal care is really good. Not that it doesn’t have it’s drawbacks.

Going to a government run health care facility means you are going to wait. It doesn’t matter what time your appointment is. I’ve been the first appointment of the morning and still waited. It’s seems to be a different amount of time always. Sometimes I don’t have to wait in the waiting room at all, but then I wait in the patient room. Sometimes I’ve had to wait over an hour in the waiting room. When I have to get blood drawn it usually means taking a number, waiting in the lobby, then when my number is called I go in the lab and give them my info and then I have to sit and wait some more. If you have to get something from the pharmacy, that’s just a nightmare. It’s usually about a three hour process. So I always bring some kind of entertainment, usually a book. Now that I have to bring Eddie along I have to make sure he is entertained as well. It also means that if I have to wait long enough it’s going to overlap with lunch as well, so I pack a lunch to eat in the cafeteria. It seems like a lot of work just to go to the doctor.

However, because it’s a teaching hospital (connected with UCLA), the doctors you see are knowledgeable and up on all the latest information. In other departments you often see a resident first and then a follow up with the doctor. In prenatal you only see the doctor. They take time to answer all your questions no matter how mundane or silly they may seem. I don’t feel like they are just seeing a number, most of the time when I see a doctor or a nurse several visits in a row they remember me.

Of course, this week’s visit was completely abnormal in the wait time department. I was in and out of the office within an hour. That is unheard of. They always want a urine sample when you get there, and I walked out of the bathroom and the nurse was already looking for me to put me in a patient room. The doctor I saw actually read my file from Eddie’s delivery, and we talked about different options for this time around. I’ll detail my childbirth experience later, it was an ordeal. Because it ended in a C-section as a result of, among other things, not dilating after attempting to induce labor, they are recommending another C-section. I’d rather avoid that if at all humanly possible. But I’d also like to not have to induce labor again if possible as well. So it’s a tough decision that we have to make about what the plan will be. But despite the quick visit, I didn’t feel rushed. Plenty of opportunities to ask questions. All my vitals are normal, all lab tests are normal, fundal measurement was fine, and baby’s heartbeat was around 150, and baby movements are good. It’s always nice when there isn’t anything that the doctor is concerned about.

I’ve had several doctors tell me my pregnancies, both the first one and this one, are almost too normal. Man, it feels good to be normal. Now if I can just have a normal delivery.

Pregnancy, take two

I’m currently about 27 weeks into my second pregnancy. It’s interesting how similar both my pregnancies have been so far. There hasn’t been a lot of difference between the two. Just a warning for the weak: this post talks about menstrual cycles and some of the joys of pregnancy that could gross you out. You know, if you’re male.

I had been taking birth control in pill form since 2001 because of irregular periods. They would be between 35 and 80 days long. It turns out putting you on birth control is the best modern medicine has figured out to regulate this. It does have the nice side effect of being able to have sex without worrying too much about getting pregnant. Because of the history of irregular periods I had thought it would be very difficult if not impossible to get pregnant. I had been let go from my job a few months before Sam and I got married, and therefore also lost my health insurance and, since I had Kaiser, also lost my doctor and pharmacy. We wanted to have kids so I figured I wouldn’t get pregnant in the few months before the wedding since it was going to be hard to get pregnant anyway, right? Wrong. Three months after taking the last birth control pill, less than a month before the wedding, and likely the first time we ever engaged in activity that could result in pregnancy without some kind of birth control, I got pregnant.

So most women have some kind of symptoms in the first month or so of pregnancy. I didn’t, other than the obvious one of not having a period. But that wasn’t unusual to me. After almost two months I decided to take a pregnancy test just in case. It was positive. Ever wondered why pregnancy tests come in packs of two? It’s because you often don’t believe the first one. Yep, the second one was also positive. I never did have any of the nausea type symptoms in the first trimester. Please don’t hate me, I had nothing to do with it. I only puked once the entire 9 months. In fact, the entire pregnancy was (for the most part) ridiculously easy. The only problem I really had was when the muscles in my abdomen called round muscles started stretching out at about 18 weeks. It felt like menstrual cramps but about five times worse. If you remember, I didn’t have health insurance. I ended up going to a county hospital emergency room because I was a bit worried. It was a touch embarrassing for the diagnosis to be: You’re pregnant, silly. However, something good did come out of it. I learned there is a low cost cash payment program for county residents. The prenatal care there turned out to be amazing, I’m currently going there for this pregnancy as well.

This pregnancy was pretty much the same story. We decided to start trying to have another kid and I stopped taking birth control. A few months later I was pregnant. So far, no puking. There have been differences, however. Last time all I wanted to eat was spicy food. I would chop up a whole serrano chile, seeds and all, into my morning eggs. For anyone unfamiliar, those are pretty spicy. My husband likes spicy food, usually more so than me, and there were a few times that I made things too spicy for him. This time, I really have no food cravings so far. This time I also don’t have the crippling fear that I won’t know what to do when the kid is born. I still wonder how I’m going to manage to take care of two at once. But the first pregnancy was easy and the kid is easy as well. This pregnancy so far as been pretty easy (more updates on that later) so I’m hoping that results in another easy baby.

But really, ten fingers and ten toes and all the other parts in the right place. That’s all I can really ask for. I’ll figure out the rest as I go along.